Episode 1 Mental Health Monday - 7 Components of Mental Health

 

Episode 1 Recovering Trash Person Podcast – Published 8.2.21

*Trigger warning: This episode touches on mental illness, psych meds, rape, and thoughts of self-harm*

What is mental health?

The dictionary defines it as: “a person’s condition with regard to their psychological and emotional well-being.”

This seems like a good place to discuss my mental health diagnoses. (In the future, there will be an episode on each of my mental illnesses). In 2000, when I was 18, I was first diagnosed with anxiety & depression and started talk therapy with a college counselor. I have been in therapy, on and off (more on than off) since. In 2012, I was diagnosed with Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder – quoted from the National Institute of Mental Health’s website: “a common, chronic, and long-lasting disorder in which a person has uncontrollable, reoccurring thoughts (obsessions) and/or behaviors (compulsions) that they feel the urge to repeat over and over.” This came to light only because the psych med I was on for my anxiety & depression (Wellbutrin) was beginning to exacerbate my OCD symptoms. I also have CPTSD (Complex Posttraumatic Stress Disorder – quoted from Healthline.com “Most people are familiar with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), an anxiety disorder that results from a traumatic event, such as a natural disaster or car accident. However, a closely related condition called complex post-traumatic stress disorder (CPTSD) is becoming more widely recognized by doctors in recent years. CPTSD results from repeated trauma over months or years, rather than a single event”) from long term exposure to trauma & abuse, as well as acquaintance rape. I also meet the criteria for Bipolar II and I believe in self-diagnosis, especially given that access to mental health care and psychiatry is not a universal right and negating someone’s mental illness based on self-diagnosis, I believe, is ableist and elitist. I also have Binge Eating Disorder – quoted from National Eating Disorders Associaton website “Binge eating disorder (BED) is a severe, life-threatening, and treatable eating disorder characterized by recurrent episodes of eating large quantities of food (often very quickly and to the point of discomfort); a feeling of a loss of control during the binge; experiencing shame, distress or guilt afterwards; and not regularly using unhealthy compensatory measures (e.g., purging) to counter the binge eating. It is the most common eating disorder in the United States.”

My day to day symptoms can include (but are not limited to): ruminations (the process of continuously thinking about the same thoughts, which tend to be sad or dark), obsessions, compulsions and hypervigilance (a state of increased alertness. If you're in a state of hypervigilance, you're extremely sensitive to your surroundings. It can make you feel like you're alert to any hidden dangers, whether from other people or the environment. Often, though, these dangers are not real).

 

 

7 Components of Mental Health

According to the website Pillars of Wellness (link included in show notes), there are 7 components of mental health:

1.      In-person therapy

2.      Community

3.      Physical heath

4.      Intellectual health

5.      Environmental Health

6.      Boundaries

7.      Self-care

The first, therapy, I have attempted to rebel against in my own life. And I’m a therapist! It’s easy to assume your growth is “good enough” and it’s easy to convince oneself they don’t *need* therapy. That may be true and it’s also true that having someone objective to talk to gives us a different perspective on matters and can often increase our emotional intelligence. When in-person therapy wasn’t an option in the pandemic, online and virtual therapy were well needed replacements. In fact, after years of struggling to find a competent therapist to connect to, I started online therapy. The “anonymity” piece gave me the space I needed to talk about some pretty tough subjects and actually made it easier for me to think of returning to in-person therapy, which thankfully I did. For me, therapy is a place where I can discuss revelations I have observed in my thoughts, feelings, and behaviors without judgment while also giving me the space to feel the feelings in a safe way.

The second is community. This is one I think gets overlooked often, because we as a society have become hyper-independent and tend to look down on people who need help or resources. I feel this component wrestles with our “American Dream” myth that working hard enough and hustling is the cure-all for mental health, ignoring that our very sick, capitalistic corpocracy is actually what’s contributing to our mental illness. In this, I see community as things like pamphlets on mental health at the doctor’s office and walk-in respite places for folx who are struggling. There is one in my city in Asheville, NC called Peer Living Room (link included) where folx can meet with Peer Support Specialists for individual or group sessions, as well as grab a hot cup of coffee, play a game, or use the computer. This service is essential, especially given the number of people without housing in our city.

The third is physical health. I’m no stranger to the Holistic Health Model and how mental health impacts physical health and vice versa, but that doesn’t stop me from scratching my head with wonder why I’m depressed every time I get a cold. Or why high levels of extended stress can result in all kinds of illnesses, from headaches to fatigue to actual physical pain and chronic and fatal conditions. Yet, like many of us, I try to pretend the physical and mental are not connected and continue to consume items that trigger mood changes (caffeine, sugar, alcohol) or find myself in the cycle of “I’m too depressed to move my body, but I know if I move my body I’ll feel less depressed.” Other things that sometimes get overlooked is the importance of sleep and hydration. The first two questions I ask myself when I’m feeling “off” is 1) how did I sleep last night and 2) when was the last time I drank water? (and then am I PMS?)

The fourth is Intellectual Health. This could include simply learning a new skill, informing yourself about your community, learning a new language, seeking new insights and information in any way. This need to learn and seek has been a cornerstone of my mental health. Challenging myself to break habits or learn a new skill is typically my go-to when I’m feeling “stuck.” I think we’ve all been there: nothing particularly good or bad is happening, everything is pretty much status quo, but you’re feeling restless and you’re not sure why, this is when I make time for learning something new OR picking up where I left off on my last learning endeavor that might have been cast aside because depression.

The fifth is Environmental Health. Your personal environment (home, place of worship, job, school, camp) should all be places where you feel seen, heard, and respected. Granted, we don’t always get that 100% of the time, but if you are noticing one particular environment is causing undue amounts of stress, it might be time to reevaluate. I spent 3 years attempting to make my work environment as comfortable and “me” as possible. I kept worry beads and crystals in my office, I had a beginning of the day ritual of spraying the four corners of my office and asking for peace. While it worked in the beginning, as my mental health needs changed, I realized the environment itself was contributing to my mental illness, despite my attempts. My needs changed and so I changed my environment.

The sixth is Boundaries. This is basically a four-letter word to me. I’m kidding, but not really. I am a codependent person, a people-pleaser, and someone who sees my worth only as a reflection of what I can do for others, so boundary setting can be very scary. It IS essential. Without boundaries, we are subject to burning ourselves out, disrespecting our limits, and in turn becoming resentful and angry at the very people we have been desperate to please. Boundaries are also two-fold. First, there is setting the boundary but the most important is the second, following through with the boundary. Even if it feels arbitrary or you’re having a good day and can commit to more time than originally discussed, I implore you to think before breaking your boundary, because for those people in our lives who are “give an inch take a mile” kind of people, it will be THAT much harder to keep boundaries in the future, if said person knows there is a chance they could “convince” (read: bully) you into breaking those boundaries again.

And last is self-care. I’m not going to lie, you will hear about self-care on this podcast a lot. A lot a lot. I know it’s a sexy little buzzword now and there’s a knee jerk eye roll reaction to hearing the word self-care, but it bears repeating: self-care is essential. We are human beings, we are not robots. Our best one day may not be our best another, because day to day our bodies, minds, and spirits differ – we grow and change all day everyday, therefore our need for self-care differs. And the kind of self-care we participate in matters as well. I love naps. I absolutely love them. I probably would have considered naps my go-to self-care activity. What I actually discovered was a lot of my “self-care activities” were actually compulsive behaviors I did to avoid my feeling, so that would be naps, drinking alcohol, binge eating, buying useless shit on Amazon, binge watching a show I’ve seen 300 times. What I now ask myself is “How would I take care of 8-year-old Melissa?” I wouldn’t give Little Me alcohol or let her buy whatever she wanted or eat until she was sick, I would listen to what I REALLY needed.

So what does this all really mean? In essence, it means that we, as humans, are well-rounded individuals that require balance. Too much or not enough will often leave us feeling off-kilter, “not myself” and can trickle down and impact so many other areas of our lives. Think of the individual who loves to keep their physical self strong by working out at the gym 2 hours a day, but doesn’t set and keep boundaries with family. That person will still experience the negative effects of not taking care of oneself, despite being in the best physical shape of their life. Think of the individual who goes to therapy every week, but their home life (with abuse, addiction, codependency) never changes. This person could end up going to therapy for years, rehashing the same scenarios over and over again, but if their home environment remains toxic and unhealthy, that person is still going to see a impact to their mental health.

Let me tell you a story…

For 3 years, I worked in a very high-stress, fast-paced environment. I was a counselor in a Methadone clinic and, like my cohorts, had many responsibilities and deadlines to contend with on a daily basis. I was used to such an environment from my previous positions in the substance use and mental health field, so I adjusted well … in the beginning. I had just left an even more stressful work environment (community health where I made house calls to folx with substance use disorders and psychotic disorders) and felt I was getting off on the right foot by setting and keeping boundaries and making my environment as comfortable and calming as possible. As more and more stressors presented at work, I continued to make my environment more and more welcoming, convincing myself all I needed to do was take breaks, use my worry beads, and take deep breaths during the day. Then, unexpectedly, my wife’s health took a turn and I was permitted 2 months of personal leave. When I returned to work after 2 months off, I assumed the ambience I had created in my office (and the time away) would be enough to challenge the triggers I was faced with when I returned. I was so wrong. Being away for 2 months made it even HARDER to acclimate because I now saw the dysfunction of my work environment with new eyes. My first day back, I came home and my wife (Laura) asked how it went. I said it went fine, because on paper it had, but observed how completely unnatural my work environment was for me. Sitting at a computer all day, meeting with patients one after the other for 16 minutes, answering phones, texts, IMs, and emails. It was beyond overwhelming. Couple that with communication breakdowns and new protocols without training and I was in full panic mode by my second morning at work. That day, I had a panic attack at work, in front of my colleagues. My co worker held me as I hyperventilated and barely squeaked out “I can’t do this.” By my fourth morning, I was wishing a car would hit me on my way into work so I wouldn’t have to face the overwhelm. I confided in people about how I was feeling, as it wasn’t unusual for me to experience this level of panic, but it was unusual to experience it so intensely for days at a time and to where it was impacting my work. A friend said something that sticks with me. She said (and I’m paraphrasing) “You can meditate, do yoga, practice your spirituality, have crystals all you want, but if the environment isn’t changing, it’s like putting ice cream on top of shit.” I couldn’t “deep breathe” my way through this. My environment needed to change. By the end of my first week back, I had written my letters of resignation, effective immediately. I am aware not everyone has the privilege make such a big decision so quickly, but if whatever is causing your mental health to suffer is environment related, I encourage you to really weigh your worth and value versus said environment. My decision did not come easy and it did not come without consequences, but I made a change that improved my mental health and without my mental wellness, I’m useless to my family, job, and most importantly myself.

I used to think mental health was a destination, a place that I strived for and once I got there, I was good. I have had that thought about many areas of life. Once I’ve been at my job for a year, I’ll feel more comfortable. Once I move to a new city, I’ll feel better. Once I lose 100 lbs, I’ll be my most authentic self. The truth is, wellness, in any sense, is a lifelong process. I won’t wake up one day completely mentally well, no need for medication, meditation, or therapy. There will be days that are easier and days that are harder, and that does not equate to good or bad. Feelings are neutral, how we communicate our feelings is where we have the power to make decisions that benefit us or decisions that alienate us.  

https://linktr.ee/recoveringtrashperson

Tip Jar: Venmo: @Melissa-McMinn-6

 

GoFundMe:

https://gofund.me/e5373ae4

 

***please note, transcripts are word docs I write before I record and may not match my words exactly if I make a change off the cuff!***


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